Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of socializing, going out for events, meeting friends, hanging out; part of it is because I’ve become more efficient and thus a bit more on track to accomplishing these little goals I have for myself on the daily, but a little bit of it I think is also because of the blessings from the people around me.

I am grateful for all of these things, and for the so many of you who have come in – strangers at first – and then parts of this strange yet beautiful slipstream of which we are all a part – all of which have led to a more flourishing time – greater joy from just being – a deeper sense from beyond the inner rim of things that there is something beyond the superficial things of life.

I am thankful for your presence, the moments where we found happiness, where it wasn’t just in the big or grandiose things that joy’s touch had reached me.

I can not, I will never be able to repay each of these gifts – but I will endeavor to be a better friend, a better source of support, a stronger person in each way – not to earn the esteem that you had already given to me, but to become even more worthy of it in thought, word, deed, that I may pass on to others the chain of benevolence of which I have become a part.

You who were there in a million and small different ways, you have no idea how much you have brought me to a better place.

I can only pray that I will be able to give you a small part of the joy that you have given to me in the days ahead 😀

A strange thing seems to be happening to one of my friends. 

I won’t say which, and I may not actually tell her about this – If she does read this, whether immediately, down the line, or otherwise, I would be happy, but I won’t count on it. 

She is a very physically beautiful person. 

I don’t just mean that in a matter of subjective opinion on my part, by the way. 

I mean that she is actually able to make a living with her beauty, not necessarily in a “wow” or “crazy” way, but I could say this: Helen of Troy had a face that could launch a thousand ships. In my friend’s case, you could say that she has a face that could launch a thousand sponsorships. 

Recently, though, it seems to me that things are getting to her head, as I see from the captions coming out in quick succession that show or reflect a pattern of thinking that is tending towards what may be a form of neurosis – and I know this because I have experienced it before. 

Perhaps you know what it means to be a narcissist. The word itself comes from the Metamorphoses of Ovid, but you wouldn’t have needed to read that to know that it means being self-absorbed, but at the same time, being self-absorbed to a point of peril.

Narcissus was an excessively beautiful young man, and he, like many other people, was seeking love. Somehow, though, he could not find that love until one day he gazed into a lake and saw his reflection, at which point he fell in love with his own image. In gazing at it, that love deepened, even as that of those around him escaped his attention for the remainder of his brief life, which concluded as he fell into the pond and drowned in a desperate attempt to embrace himself. 

I feel no ill will towards my friend or any negative feelings, but somehow, it feels to me that the path she is going on is not a good one. 

I hope I am wrong.

It is a little awkward to raise it now, though, so I will just leave this as a blog post alongside a simple Malay proverb: “Siapa yang makan cili, dia yang rasa pedas.”